Insanity button hit...

Emotions of waiting to register...

As I sit here and wait for registration to open for Cairns 70.3 Ironman.  There are all sorts of gobshite floating around in my head.  The number one being, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?  Then, you are bloody nuts?  Who thinks, swimming 1.9km in Trinity Inlet with the snappy hand bags with 3,000 other people is fun?  Who then thinks riding 90km along one of Australia's great coastlines, is fun?  And then, why not, throw in a half marathon because you weren't having enough fun already?  Nuts right.  Yep.

The onset of midlife crisis has well and truly hit, leaving me doubt whether all my hormones have taken away my ability to make sane decisions. In all the crazy stuff and challengers I've done, this is one way out of the comfort zone.  So why do we make these (at this point) stupid, crazy decisions.  First and foremost I blame it on Coach M.   It is well and truly all her fault for planting the seed and making me believe I can do this.  Then, the crazy people I train with for also, making me believe I can do this.  My amazing husband for all his support; "give it a go Smash". 

Said list, could go on, but do you see the pattern and key ingredient.  Surrounding yourself with people that believe in you, even when you don't.  It gets you to start to "believe anything is possible", and hey why not give this crazy, foolish, idiotic, daft, unwise, outlandish, peculiar, eccentric....ok the thesaurus is running out of words now, thing a go. 

So, while I feel absolutely nauseated at having to press that button for rego.  At the same time;  Wow this is really happening, buggar me, and back to the WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING, train of thought.  It's a bit like training, a roller coaster.  One minute you have had awesome swim session, run, feeling very "Olympic".  Next swim session you feel like you are drowning doing catch up drills and chicken wings.  I keep coming back to that feeling of crossing the finishing line last year, totally amazing and out of this world of happiness after all the hard work and smile.

Now; tick....tick...tick.....waiting for 11am ....

All done and still feel sick...

BOOOOMMM.. the bell has rang and rego is now complete.  I don't know whether I want to scream from the top of the Pyramid (although that would involve a 1km walk up hill, pass) or dive into the ocean avoiding all stingers and scream there.  As hubby always says; what's done is done, now get on with it.

That is the plan, with a lot, and I mean a lot of help from my crazy coaches, crazy training partners, who most are having same crazy thoughts together right at this time.   

As my hands shake typing this, because it is a nutty real, moment in time.  The ultimate choice to do this was MINE, so here goes I'll leave the final words to Eleanor Roosevelt and let's get this party started. 

"You have to accept whatever comes and the only important thing is that you meet it with courage and with the best that you have to give.
Eleanor Roosevelt"

Happy training crazy ones

Shell xo :)

Lets get the party started crazy ones....whoot woo :)

Happy Australia Day

Oz Day hang out with gang..Empowerfx

Happy Australia Day to you all.

I hope you have had a great long weekend and enjoyed yourselves.

 Monday being the public holiday,  just because its a public holiday Coach M made sure we still had some fun, and didn't have our butts permanently on the couch all day.

 It was out and enjoy the Barron Gorge Road.  Almost 10km of undulating hills, rainforest, Barron River running beside, Stony Creek Falls at the end of the adventure.

Part of Stony creek falls taken by Savannah Photography

We are pretty lucky to live in a place surrounded by the rainforest and the reef.  With a little bit of rain drizzling through the leaves of the rainforest to keep down the heat.  It was nice to do the cliffy shuffle along the road.  While, it may be a time for the required nanna nap now,  great way to spend the morning with crazy crew.  Even surprised myself by running most of the way.  Woot woo the "olympic" feeling is creeping back.  :)

Just keep running..
Shell

PS:  Finger biting time is approaching sign on time is tomorrow, hmmm interesting emotions are swirling around ones head, and stomach.  Where is the chocolate, or paper bag so can breathe properly ha ha.

Hiccups

First week of training done, dusted, and it's a great feeling.  Made it...almost.  There be one hiccup there and that was sick for super saturday training.  Which is alot of time on the bike, ocean swimming and running.  So feeling a little, bloody hell but sometimes you can't control these things.

Although, I really would have preferred to have had a great night drinking  and dancing,  then waking up with hang over.  Instead it appeared nature had its way and didn't have awesome night of fun and still woke up with worst headache and stomach not knowing which direction to go.  Feeing like worst hang over ever.  Like you really wanted to know that I'm sure but it is part of the adventure, I guess.

The thing now is to get back on track and hope there are no more hangovers via non drinking methods, sickness, but will take it one day at time and see how it all goes.  It's one day at a time.  Apparently it is the key to making it to the end.   I'm hoping.  :)

Cheers
Shell :)

Kick off...

Well yesterday was "officially" kick off for 20 week programme.  Starting on the path to finishing the Cairns 70.3 Ironman in June 2014.  I'm not sure yet, whether to smile and jump around like a Mexican bean with happiness.  Or find a corner and assume the foetal position, whilst rocking in said corner.  The jury is out.  Like my level of mid life crisis sanity, at the moment.  Then again, hey, you gotta be in it to win it.

 

So, yesterday, day one.  I woke up and said; "motivation, motivation where for art thou motivation."  It was left back in the calm of the weekend, with giggles and laughter.  Finally, got to the pool, pushed off from the edge and through my head was running; buggar me, it's all started now.  Then I discovered I've actually taken off 14sec of my 50m laps from 12 months ago.  I'm still no fish and I really would prefer to do it all breaststroke but I'm getting there.    Woot woo.  Thanks to coach la frog :). 

The night finished off with my grandma shuffle with team mates at the Esplanade.  Little thing called 1km and 2km time trials.  With 1km recoveries.  Isn't that nice to have a wee breather in-between all that goodness of running. Then I thought, hey 18 months ago I couldn't jog a 1km, now I'm doing 2km with help of teamies.  Another big, Woot woo.

When I got home I had the same feeling as the Jamaica Bobsled team of Cool Runnings; "I am feeling very Olympic today".  :)   Even though everyone passed me.  I didn't care because I remembered, hey before I couldn't do this and look what I'm doing now.   

Today's adventure however; was 30km on the bike.  I'm a total newcomer to the bike.  I just got it at the end of last year, and well if I had of ridden over the festive season.   I reckon it would be a close call with the man in blue.  (The sacrifices you choose to make :).)  Anyways, today's task is done.  Not pretty.  No "Olympic" feeling, jelly legs, speed wobbles trying to get water bottle because so bleeding hot, nearly fell over in my street trying to unclip...blah blah blah (ramblings of old duck continue).   You may have gathered; not my favourite part of training, yet, but will get there.  I may need to remind my legs of that tomorrow too, when I can't walk and have to hit the bike again.  :{

In a nut shell, though I think the really important thing and Coach M tells us ALL the time.  Take it day by day.  Don't forget to look back and see how far you've come.  Sometimes I think we are all guilty of not being fulfilled of what achievements have crossed our paths, in life, family, job, training.  We are too busy trying to get to the end, instead of enjoying the ride.  Well, what a ride this one is going to be, is all I'm saying.  I might even beat Big Dog (Newcastle thing) to bed tonight, the eyes very heavy and body just wants to be horizontal.  Ha ha.

Safe riding

Cheers

Shell 

Diet, Fads, and all that other ....

Since Christmas, the vibe on social media, how everyone is going on a diet.  They need to lose weight and a diet will fix everything.  "Oh, I've lost 3kg this week, in only a week"  "I'm fat, I need to lose

weight"  "I'm going on a diet"  I cringe at all these things.  Trust me, I've been on the roller coaster to weight loss probably from late 20's until maybe 18 months ago.  I know how amazing it feels to lose weight and feel good about yourself from that quick fix.  Then old habits start to creep in, emotions (I am biggest emotional eater) take over and over time, that weight creeps in and your scales tell you, your are sooooooo obese, your BMI is crap and you feel like shite.  So let's go to the fridge to make it better..arrgh.

At the end of 2012, while sort of committing to swimming in a team.  I notice this peculiar thing.  My body shape was changing.  Clothes started to fit better, and I actually took notice of what I was eating because I didn't want this great feeling going away.  Yep, I was still having chocolate but instead of having the whole 250g block in one sitting, I'd only have a little.  (It's a miracle how long it lasts when you do that)  I didn't feel guilty about eating it.  I enjoyed. 

By January 2013, wow I was feeling so good.  Clothes loose, working hard at training.  Still had my curves but there was more shape and I started to like me.  Because before my light bulb moment, I wasn't really getting on with myself. 

Then I thought I'm doing so well, I'm going to get those scales to tell me how good I've been.  BAMMMM end of happiness.   I was heavier even though clothes loser and I felt great.  My coach has always explained muscle is heavier, skip the scales....but at that moment in time, it was the end of my world.  Then, after self pity, the whole why me crap (it's never a good thing)  I decided me and my scales had to part ways and this is what I said:

8th February 2013

Dearest Scales

You have long been my nemesis.  You go UP, Down, UP, down; yes, at some point I have to take responsibility.  So I am.  I will no longer be governed by your numbers and how you make me feel.  When I eat right, exercise, my clothes begin to feel lose.  I feel amazing. 

Yet when I step on you, your numbers tell a different story. 

You then get into my happy head space where I was feeling amazing, and because I’m an emotional eater.  I binge, say why do I bother and eat crap food and don’t exercise.  Then I feel like crap again.  I step on you and the numbers stay the same.  Arrrrrrrrrgh.  Frustration.

So you know what.  I know I’m responsible for me. It takes baby steps, to get to the end goal.   I’m not going to be ruled by you anymore.  My happy head space belongs to me.  I’m going to have chocolate, beer, red drink when I want, and not feel guilty because I’m learning a new word; it’s called moderation.  I’m going to trip up now and again but that’s ok.

I love the fact that tennis doesn’t seem like exercise because it’s fun.  Being crazy at beach boot camp, running up crazy hills stuffs me.  But I’ve achieved something. Yet I’m sure you’d tell me differently.  I may be puffing like billy the train but I gave it a go.  I’m happy I did.

So, it may take me one, maybe two years to reach my goal of all over 14.  But I don’t care, you’re not going to be there to make me feel unhappy because I might have had one or two bad weeks, months.  I have wonderful supportive people around me.  Super coach.  Who are there on good days and the bad days when kryptonite cripples my super girl powers.

So I’m just going to roll with the punches; I’m only human with a touch of super girl.  Not perfect, never will be.  Life is too short to get hung up by numbers on a scale.  If you are giving it a go, eating healthily, and exercising, I’m going to be in that positive/happy place.

Bring on the day I can go and pick off the rack my size 14 Wayne Cooper (or other designer) straight dress.  I’m going to get there without your help.  Adios amigo, goodbye, ciao, bye bye, may the dust now cover your screen in retirement.

Yours faithfully

A girl with lots of curves

And that is that.  No more scales, the only use they get from me is weighing my luggage when I travel.  Yes, I'm tempted every now and again to jump but there, my will power is strong, and tape measure, clothes, positive people, loving life and my happy head space are my friends.

Everyone is different, and we all do the diet things for different reasons.  I just wish society would stop with the word diet and quick fix options and go for the "lifestyle" change that you can live with everyday.  Make those little changes over time that will sustain and be better healthier you.  Be happy with the clothes, fuel you put in your body, exercise you do, whatever it is.  Most of all be comfortable in your own skin.  There are a lot of pressures we put on ourselves today; by society, social media and in general being harsh on ourselves for minuscule things.  Instead of living healthy, enjoying life, being positive and not getting hung up on all the crap (little things).  

 

In the end the choice is yours.  If you are really honest with yourself, and look within, you know if you are doing the best you can, to live a healthy lifestyle.   (I said healthier, not perfect.)  If you aren't, are YOU going to change or stay the same?  It is up to YOU and no-one else.  Never forget we are all only human, and life is a roller coaster of ups and downs.  It's about making the best of the ride and most importantly, enjoying it along the way.  Everybody's' path is different there is no deigning that, but try and make it an amazing one.

Here's to happy healthy life, whatever YOU choose.  Oh, and a wee red drink and chocolate, every now and again.  (I hope, not to get too excited on next social gathering.  Then again there are no promises though; only human :).)

Shell xo :)